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Bon voyage

12 Oct


I’m migrating to America soon. Imagining something along these lines…

Images from “The Arrival” by Shaun Tan



13 Sep



All of them on Friday please.

An open letter to the mess on my desk

15 Aug

Dear mess on my desk

When I came into work this morning, I expected to find your usual medley of junk greeting me – the only thing that greets me – but as soon as I sat down, I knew something was different.

Was it as pure and simple as a thicker layer of dust on my computer screen? Or the sticky sheen of that spilt yoghurt I haven’t quite gotten round to wiping off? The diet coke cans- three thereof?  Of course not, no. These things have been adding to your wit, charm, and overwhelming good-looks ever since I have known you. Something else, something more significant had happened; you’d changed.

But I mean really, I shoulda seen it coming. Your goal-driven, go get ‘em attitude and top-notch leadership skills should have forewarned me. You’re like a pioneer, charting new territory, flipping the bird at danger. Like your accumulation of V cans over in the corner there- some people would think eek! Fly magnet! But you just laugh- like fly-spawn would bother you. Or the pile of OK! magazines, speckled with my greasy fingerprint-ghosts of lonely lunchtimes. Fear of judgement would make people run a mile, but you stand, unashamedly, by your trashy tastes. And that small container of chicken-fried rice you are hoarding – oh yes I’ve noticed – it really screams ‘bring it on salmonella – I fucking dare you!’ Like you give a damn. I guess what I’m trying to tell you is I admire your courage, I really do. Who needs validation from other living things?

So why was I surprised to find this morning that you’d added an olfactory element to your previously visual existence? I owe you an apology- I underestimated you. I’m sorry.

People probably thought your soft, slightly nauseating, overly-ripe banana smell would put me off you. But I have to admit, as your new-found aroma enveloped me, I felt strangely at peace. I realised, mess on my desk, that you created this pong for a reason. You alone have been with me my whole life – messing up my bedroom, locker, dorm room, relationships – so if anything was going to make me feel included, loved, it would be you. You read my mind – I was lonely – and decided to act – bang! Once again, your decisive nature astounds me.

So now I am at one with you, mess on my desk; we share the same acrid, rotten odour. So let my boss make ‘pig pen’ quips at staff meetings all he wants! Let the cleaning lady pointedly vacuum in a 3 meter diameter around us! Let my colleagues file harassment cases against me! I will not tremble. It’s me and you versus the world, mess on my desk. So let’s spill coffee on original documents and pile snotty tissues in celebration of the anarchy that is our unity. I love ya pal.

Yours forever

E. Mercado.

Your eyesight gets better & better in a very short space of time: Magic Eye

21 Jul

Walking home last night, I caught a very distinct wiff on the chilly night air, and was dragged sinus-first back to my childhood – bare feet, hot tar, ‘Alexis is a lesbeean and so is her brother’ tagged on the school fort, a brief fling with Christianity (mainly for the free tea and biscuits) – it all came back in an olfactory flood of deep-fried goodness: fush und chups. The Ngaio fish and chip shop was nothing special, far from it- soggy and salty, but what more could you want I guess. The one thing that really set it above the rest was its sweet sweet Magic Eye poster.


So the smell of deep fry is forever linked in my mind to those 90s fluro posters, each tacky colour jostling for a place in the masses, a refugee camp for rejected, overly-bright hues. So for a psychedelic trip down memory-lane, I looked some up, and here they are, as ugly and magical as ever. For a second I thought maybe they wouldn’t work on a computer screen – pixels etc etc, but happily, they, like the Da Vinci Code, remain crackable. Enjoy. And FYI, the post title is the name of the original, Japanese, Magic Eye book. Awesome.

Old school

8 Jul
I got a new (old Minolta) camera and, after five years of no-practice, am getting back in to the swing of manual photography. Using slide film and cross processing, I made these pics, and am proud like a new mother. So much more satisfying than digital/Holgas that do all the fun/hard work for you. Now all I need is more sunshine, so I can take more more more!
And unwilling models, I thank you. If you are unhappy with your 15 minutes of cyber-space fame, I can take your photo down… 



6 Jul

I am super stressed at the moment, for many small, no-good, reasons. This makes two things happen:

1. excessively sore tummy.

2. horrifically bitten cuticles/nails/fingers in general.

I was biting them in a meeting today even, how creepy is that? And when I saw this awesome manicure by super-stylish manicurist Deborah Lipmann, I felt even worse about who I was. But be gone, negativity, I say be gone! 

So tonight, I paint my nails. Tomorrow, take over the world.


1 Jul

I just decorated my room with this series of work by Francis Alÿs, who exhibited six years ago at the Sydney Biennale. Just realised I’m subconsciously colour-co-ordinating my room with my blog. Eek. Is this the Matrix?